As so often happens in life, I must admit I cannot live up to the standards set forth by Billy Ocean.
'Cos when the going gets tough
The tough get going
When the going gets rough
The tough get rough
(Billy Ocean, "When the Going Gets Tough")
I have been, as you all know, crushed of late by the volume of work and what having that volume of work means for the other things that are part of life.
The good news is, as of today, there is a very visible break in the storm in clouds, and I almost feel human again today for the first time in a long while. A backlog that has been over our heads for an incredibly long time has finally been reduced. Not only does that mean the volume of work should be normalizing, but the stress of work should also be normalizing.
Even so, I'm having to face up to reality. I am, by nature, an all-in kind of guy. Whatever I'm doing, I want to be as absolutely close to 100% effort as I can be. That sounds admirable, but only when tempered by rational thought and an honest evaluation of time, health, and energy. I lack that tempering.
And so, even in the best of times, it is in my nature to try and give 100% of myself to my job, to my writing, to my volunteer work, and so forth. Of course, this is mathematically impossible. It is also physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually impossible.
I'm looking forward to being able to get back to writing, but also realizing with some sadness that I do not relate to people can hold down jobs and pursue their writing diligently. That's too bad, because I'm someone who does have to hold down a job, and this means that my writing will always suffer some because of it.
On the other hand, being honest about this also has something of a relieving quality, as it means I probably don't need to beat myself up over it quite as much as I tend to.
I'm hoping that for the moment the easing of craziness at work will allow me to finally write and be human again. Please look up my page on Facebook, if haven't (https://www.facebook.com/c.n.nevets). I'll be probably be micro-blogging there a bit more, as that can be done in easy snippets.